Monday, October 1, 2018

Just Be

Here's over 2500 years of meditation instruction distilled into barely a phrase. It’s the cosmic joke that you can’t really laugh at, but hopefully we can smile along with it.

Anyhow, my knowing mind is a bit jarred right now. And I consider that a good thing, because not-knowing is always subsequent to knowing. But for my omniscient-wannabe mind, this takes a lot of intention without effort. In fact, I wish I could write more symbolically today because this discursive language just moves me away from what is.

Yes, I am meandering. I just did a self-retreat, following along to some audios from a retreat Jeff Carreira had in August. I've known Jeff for several years, and he's become a very skillful teacher at distilling the dharma for a post-secular demographic. There's an elegant and affable simplicity as to how he teaches, and it was just what was needed now.

Writing about retreats is challenging. We can be on point with insights, but lose the circumference of the depth. I’m sure that’s what Dávila meant when he said: To be stupid is to believe that it is possible to take a photograph of the place about which the poet sang.

That’s why I can only write for an audience of one. I could never authentically write in the way that would be consumptive for the masses. 

But for what it’s worth for my reader of one, here’s my big takeaways. These are not necessarily quotes from Jeff, but an amalgamation of his direct pointers, my paraphrasing and interpretations, and whatever Truth needs to be brought out in this moment...

Humility is to accept we have seen without evidence. The bottom line is faith matters! We take more things on faith than we realize. Even science is predicated on uncertainty (see Karl Popper’s falsifiability). So the leap is always part of the process that can happen in any moment when we decide. God is always there, even when not seen with certitude.

I don't want to believe all my hard meditation work is for naught. Come to mediation as a beginner each time. It’s the only way we can be open enough for the unexpected to occur. And things also occur the way they need to. We all have our own karma.

The miracle of the sacred is it shows it’s going to be okay although problems persist. On a fundamental level we are all okay existentially even if things must change, but that fundamental place is the best place to act on that change.

Why do we meditate? It is an access point to the Divine, so we can see the sacredness in life. It can liberate us into life, so we don’t lose our center while participating in the Passion of life. Moreover, we don't become indifferent to life, but indifferent to the afflictions of the mind that don't allow us to fully engage in life!

People will do anything to avoid pain. Spiritual bypassing is just another version of this. We can always find some avoidance activity. But eventually we have to become available for the pain so God can be available for us. We can love our afflictions as old friends, so as to not always be thrown by them. It's not always easy, but something is strengthened by the struggle.

You can only get good at what you practice. Meditation (as technique) isn't something you necessarily want to get good at. Better to just be. Don’t do meditation, let the mediation find me. Grace, not so much effort.

It takes a lot of humility to identify with an experience you barely have. And yet, there is no spiritual experience that will change your life. It just gives us an excuse to change. We are always empowered to change by allowing to be changed. 

Give more attention to the part of ourselves that has clarity over confusion. Better to make life decisions from clarity.

Most people are looking for a better deal than life itself. There is no better deal than just being. The issue is we are not comfortable with life itself.

Awakening is a function of the life you're living. It is not a personal quality! You can't have it, like intelligence or attractiveness. 

Good pointer: Don't try to meditate, just let the part of you that already knows how to find the meditation, and then just rest there and forget yourself. Let your mind be busy while you rest in the Truth of who you are. I don’t need to strive; it’s the commitment to show up that takes care of the effort needed for effortless. There is an Unconditioned Freedom no matter what my experience is.

Where there is Kundalini that overwhelms, gently talk to the Kundalini to underwhelm.

As I mentioned earlier, not-knowing is always subsequent to knowing. But if we can just be, we can fall in love with the not-knowing more than anything we can know. Spiritual experiences don't add up to the way things are, but affirms that the Truth adds up to a lot more than we can imagine. 

In that Freedom, the edges will keep revealing themselves in the midst of our love for what is.

So, just be.